What Really Causes Dark Triad Behavior? The Roots of Human Predators. Peter Salerno & Deb Lieberman

Comments (1,180)

1. @

   @BradCarr_ 7 months ago

   Peter Salerno and Deb Lieberman discuss the roots of dark traits like psychopathy and narcissism. Time stamps below.
   00:00 In This Episode
   00:55 Introducing Peter Salerno and Deb Lieberman
   01:56 Understanding Dark Personalities: The Genetic Roots
   03:25 The Evolutionary Angle
   04:56 The Role of Psychoeducation in Healing
   06:22 Gaps in Science and Personal Experience
   11:56 Education as a Tool for Protection
   15:54 The Impact of Technology on Human Interaction
   20:52 The Evolutionary Perspective on Psychopathy
   29:47 The Nature of Psychopathy: Traits and Variations
   37:50 The Controversy of Genetic Influence in Therapy
   45:25 Attraction and Psychopathic Traits
   52:17 The Complexity of Mate Choice
   54:08 Manipulation and Attachment Bonds
   57:18 Shame and Self-Reflection
   01:02:54 Understanding Shame in Victims and Perpetrators
   01:10:54 The Nature of Relationships and Boundaries
   01:22:04 Tools for Recovery and Future Projects
   01:23:51 Peter and Deb's Workbook

   44 likes

2. @

   @CLS51 7 months ago

   She repeatedly says that these people are easily spotted -they are not. She is referring to the lower functioning, overt, criminal type. But there are extremely high functioning, covert and communal types that are not easy to spot.

   416 likes

3. @

   @odinliamwright 7 months ago

   Everything fell into place when I accepted that it was intentional.

   180 likes

4. @

   @personanongrata7976 7 months ago

   Born in late fifties.
   I am better equipped now than ever before, and I owe that to Youtube.
   I've learned about how to respond to the threat of violence,
   how to "talk to girls,"
   how to use the tool of violence,
   how to spot predators and other threats,
   how to understand narcissists (narcissists use abuse the way I use sugar and saturated fat, i.e. to self-regulate).
   I learned all the things my parents couldn't possibly have taught me.
   The screen has saved my life.
   Unlike the TV screen, which was an instrument of propaganda.

   117 likes

5. @

   @JadeJones-gq4kr 7 months ago

   i was married to a NPD/psychopath for 25 years; i was not educated on these types of people and suffered mentally as a result. My husband was very good looking, charming, successful and charismatic; everyone loved him and thought he was a great guy; for this reason, i thought for so many years that it was all me. Additionally, when i decided to leave no one believed me, not even my own daughter. he had everyone fooled. my ex was a highly intelligent one.. it has taken me years to heal and i still, six years post divorce, have to continue my reinforcement and education so i do not go back to him. its like being in a cult

   20 likes

6. @

   @lesliethurston2151 7 months ago

   Exact words spoken: "I'm a master manipulator, unfortunately." Evidence they are acutely aware of their wrongdoings.

   65 likes

7. @

   @davashorb6116 3 months ago

   From my personal experience, I agree that narcissists run on contempt, not shame .

   21 likes

8. @

   @denisesorenson4000 7 months ago

   My daughter in my opinion was born a narcissist I saw it right away I didn’t know what it was though. My MIL and her grandmother were malignant narcissists and that whole side of the family is very messed up. I love my daughter but, even as a young child the way she handled her friends and siblings at the age of 3 was different than other kids, as an adult I see it for what it is I just have to handle her sense of entitlement and control differently. It’s been very difficult because in her mind if I don’t give her everything she wants or even if I do I am her bad guy in her story she has to be a victim while manipulating you so no matter what your relationship is never going to be normal not how relationships usually look that give and take. With a narcissist it’s you have to completely give and expect nothing in return,

   97 likes

9. @

   @kylielogan8771 7 months ago

   Sometimes you become codependent for a short time staying in an abusive relationship for temporary survival until you get out. They never apologize with real intentions or change their actions don’t match up. They’re bullies but when safely you stand up they can crumble. My natural tendency goes towards feeling sorry for them, I have to remind myself they keep repeating same patterns of hurtful behaviors. All of us have been hurt but we don’t intentionally hurt others. You have to be strong and don’t invite them back for another round.

   19 likes

10. @

    @Yewbrahhh 4 months ago

    The problem with the argument that narcs and other predators are just abused victims or whatever is that for every situation there’s someone else who’s been through the same thing if not worse and grew up to be completely opposite.

    11 likes

11. @

    @carvercapitalequitypartner122 5 months ago

    When I explain how I was defrauded to someone I don't know well, they assume it was my own fault because regular people don't get scammed. Obviously I must have been careless or even foolish.
    When I mention "female psychopath" it's really starting to sound shaky to them. Psychopaths don't plot financial schemes; they stalk you in a dark parking lot and stab you with an ice pic or something. Obviously you're not telling the whole story, which is going past their attention span anyway. They gesture to leave and then go on their merry way.
    
    They have no idea that evil can approach in a "chance meeting" with a friendly person with a sincere interest in getting to know you. At one time, you had no idea either. With a smile they say how you seem like an interesting person, and introduce themselves. They ask things like "what brings you here?" and "where are you from?". You are compelled to say just a little about yourself. " You are thinking this is how a friendship forms, or even romance. You enjoy their warm energy and are soon surprised that you share some common interests. You cautiously welcome this new person into your life because you're a cautious person, right? That's how it goes.

    12 likes

12. @

    @heathergkutch6283 7 months ago

    Part of the problem with counselors recognizing this biological phenomenon is that they are taught that the human has potential for growth and change and to reach higher moral development if given the chance. I see it in religious groups as well. They believe endlessly in the goodness and the potential of human beings without understanding the manipulative and exploitative nature in some people. Also since these are all traits with complex gene combinations you might get narcissistic traits like entitlement and grandiosity but no interest or ability to manipulate or exploit others. So there are individual expressions of multiple traits. This person might have more interest in working on a relationship even with limited empathy. So it is not always straight forward. They are not all psychopaths.

    15 likes

13. @

    @annekenney6914 7 months ago

    They may be very smart at the destructive things they do, but they aren't necessarily smart in a general way. They have had a lot of practice and they don't dilute their cunning nature with self-reflection or improvement.

    29 likes

14. @

    @Cassandra_prophetess 7 months ago

    So basically going to therapy is a coin toss whether you are helped or hurt by the therapy.

    62 likes

15. @

    @beverleykirby8395 7 months ago

    It doesn't affect the outcome if we care how it was caused in a person but survivors naturally want to understand the whole perspective post coersive abuse. It enables full integration with the healing process.

    13 likes

16. @

    @lenaolsson3673 7 months ago

    Concerning shame, narcissistic shame and ”normal shame”.. it’s not the same! She doesn’t know what she’s talking about.. Narcissists are empty, caught in early childhood, their shame is all about what they are not - adult individuals with an ego, because their ego is not functioning, it has been replaced by a false self - that’s why they rage and react and then act on their ”revenge” as protection of the false self. They can never self reflect or learn, there is no self to evolve.. They have to protect the false self in their minds.. it’s a shell either way, with just a black hole inside, then different masks, layer upon layer..

    14 likes

17. @

    @WisdomOfBodySiderealAstrology 7 months ago

    I'm so happy about your collaboration, all of you. I have Dr Salerno's book, Cruelty By Nature, and I am teaching myself with your material so I can help ex-Mormons coming out of a high coercive control religious cult environment.

    40 likes

18. @

    @gamelion3657 7 months ago

    I do know multiple narcissists who were definitely abused in the same ways they abuse others, by their parent. But that doesn’t make it ok!!! They of ALL people should know how absolutely devastating and destructive it is and NEVER do it. I would rather die than be like them. Hurting people who love and trust you. For FUN! My abuser TOLD us it was FUN for him to hurt us all, and to scare us. Disgusting.

    19 likes

19. @

    @onika700 7 months ago

    I know an eight year old who has a learning disability and acts like a narcissist, but his family is very nice, not abusive at all. He tells other people all the time he is smarter than they are and tries to prove it to himself. He gets angry if he isn't validated. He tries to intimidate people with his anger.

    7 likes

20. @

    @TeresaY2A 7 months ago

    There are abuses that are parasitic, some are symbiotic or mutualistic. In school, in the process of learning we need to understand the difference so mutualism doesn't turn parasitic.

    13 likes