My Struggle to Receive God’s Loving Acceptance
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I lived my whole life with a deep passion for growth and transformation. But there were many struggles I could not shake off right away. Some never seemed to stop. The more I tried, the worse it got at times.
I carried a deep anger, continually beating myself up for the lack of progress I seemed to be manifesting. Meanwhile, I was relentlessly hard on myself in how I evaluated my journey.
After years of living like this, the frustration led me to face myself in a whole new way. I wanted results, but I did not love myself. God entered into my pain to teach me how to see myself with new eyes.
I didn’t know how to be ok with not being ok. In my conditioning, it was unacceptable. It felt like failure. So, for most of my life, I built a foundation on making sure I was “good” for people. I didn’t know how to make room for weakness, mistakes and struggle, without feeling deep shame and embarrassment.
I felt like when I wasn’t “good,” a giant spotlight was on me, as if everyone was gasping at the sight of, “Mark’s not doing good!” I always felt I had to be strong for everyone. So, when I was not, I didn’t know how to manifest it in a healthy way.
When I learned to experience self-compassion, God’s love became more real to me. This loving acceptance gave me a powerful glimpse of the Father’s perspective over my life and battles. It also became a major turning point for growth and empowered decisions. I was able to see life with greater clarity. Love gave me that ability.
Join The Heart Healing Journey: https://markdejesus.com/the-heart-healing-journey-book/
God Loves Me and I Love Myself: https://markdejesus.com/god-loves-loves-me-and-i-love-mys…
I carried a deep anger, continually beating myself up for the lack of progress I seemed to be manifesting. Meanwhile, I was relentlessly hard on myself in how I evaluated my journey.
After years of living like this, the frustration led me to face myself in a whole new way. I wanted results, but I did not love myself. God entered into my pain to teach me how to see myself with new eyes.
I didn’t know how to be ok with not being ok. In my conditioning, it was unacceptable. It felt like failure. So, for most of my life, I built a foundation on making sure I was “good” for people. I didn’t know how to make room for weakness, mistakes and struggle, without feeling deep shame and embarrassment.
I felt like when I wasn’t “good,” a giant spotlight was on me, as if everyone was gasping at the sight of, “Mark’s not doing good!” I always felt I had to be strong for everyone. So, when I was not, I didn’t know how to manifest it in a healthy way.
When I learned to experience self-compassion, God’s love became more real to me. This loving acceptance gave me a powerful glimpse of the Father’s perspective over my life and battles. It also became a major turning point for growth and empowered decisions. I was able to see life with greater clarity. Love gave me that ability.
Join The Heart Healing Journey: https://markdejesus.com/the-heart-healing-journey-book/
God Loves Me and I Love Myself: https://markdejesus.com/god-loves-loves-me-and-i-love-mys…
@keithandtricia
I like the idea of so many people in the Bible mess up and still get to experience great things with God.
140 likes
@zitroanor
"My destiny can't be pinned on me doing everything right." Talk about taking the pressure off. TY
48 likes
@realdocphil
This is me!!!!.I didn't know what love really was....I had to receive God's love by Faith.
33 likes
@juliew2374
We focus on the wrong thing - SELF. Judging, evaluating our worth and works. We'll ALWAYS fall short.
Like a little child we need to just receive our Daddy's love. Just saying to ourselves (words are powerful) Thankyou Father, Lord that your love for me is ....unconditional, unchanging, unearned, unending....can help us focus in the right direction. Even if we need to say it all throughout the day. Because its true! 🕊
6 likes
@quin2809
When i tell you this is exactly what im currently going through the obssessive thoughts the thinking trying to work in salvation when Jesus tells us to rest and accept love where you at its been like since 2020 a long time God spoke this to me the last week after going to church on my own for the first time through the pastor about receiving forgiveness receiving love and God would and is showing me this with jacob how he lied constantly but that didn’t determine Gods blessings over his life and the Love of God, God still loved him the same.
8 likes
@Kalilah555
Wow... This is so healing. Lord help me receive your Love so I can Love like You.
9 likes
@FrankOakleyTheThird
Wow. I’ve been praying to understand the Father’s love this week and every bit and word of this video I can relate to on a very deep level and this is 1000% what I needed to hear. Learning how to accept His love in the midst of the struggle, “…in my current state, apart of performance, achievement etc.” The Holy Spirit has pointed out to me to focus on His love and how I struggle with a disconnect with His love (don’t really know how to accept it at times, even as a believer). So this was a very spot on message. Thank you for sharing your testimony and experience in this area! 💯🙏🏾
21 likes
@juanitacrocker2474
I think a lot of people struggle with these same issues...and the more I listen to your videos is that not only am I a very broken person but also many if not most people struggle....and many do not know how to love unconditionally...we humans evaluate ourselves and others thru the lens of conditional love...rather then unconditional love. Your teachings really resonate with me, I so want/need to know what it us like to really KNOW the love if God in the way Hes always intended me to. God bless you Mark, everything you've said I so relate to...we so need these words...
11 likes
@angelinecilliers4875
I want to say THANK YOU from the bottom of my heart for this. I have walked many years believing I knew God loves me but had soo many struggles. By the Holy Spirit I came across this testimony on audio and searched you down to find you on YouTube. What a transformation my life is now taking and I'm sharing with all I know.
Once again bless you for changing soo many lives out of obedience to The Master's Voice.
4 likes
@John--qh9xl
Really good, Mark, thanks. 61 Years of performance orientation due to not being able to be what others wanted me to be. Chronic, severe migraines and CPTSD have been a real challenge all that time. I really don't think I could have made it at all without God's Word helping to renew my mind and my incredible wife God brought into my life 49 years ago. I will look into more of your teachings. Thanks, again.
7 likes
@tinroofduo1437
Here's what hit me: If I think I need to do everything right, then there's no room for God, Jesus, and His grace. "Apart from me you can do nothing." So sitting in my performance guilt means I'm not leaving room for God to work. Thanks for this word!
63 likes
@mmowec8159
The timing of this.....I can't describe how perfect this timing is. This entire video is ME. I couldn't have needed this at a more opportune time. Thank you. This topic makes me so emotional. Today I have felt so much pressure to be "perfect ". Every day really
So glad you are back! Was just saying I hope Mark returns soon. Hope you had an amazing Sabbatical 🙂
9 likes
@lindseyrae8598
I really struggle with this. Thank you so much for the breath of fresh air.
2 likes
@nelisiweselulu9162
Wow , wow , wow ! Thank you sir for this . Found myself sobbing , you've accurately described how I've been feeling throughout my existence .
3 likes
@EquippedForHim
Christians! Pray for me, for healing from abuse as a child and some strongholds. Please and thank you, if you have requests let me know. Mark, say a prayer for me and thank you for your service to The LORD.
60 likes
@ms181
two beliefs that block my acceptance of God's love: that I can't have what I didn't earn...and being open to love means being vulnerable and not safe
36 likes
@danielbu2611
As I was listening to this I had a breakthrough.
I've been frustrated the past week or so not feeling very connected to God, but I've seen it as an opportunity to trust regardless of how I feel at the time. (Edit: this includes experiences, too. FAITH in what GOD SAYS, not what our feelings or past experiences say).
As you were talking, suddenly the parable of abiding in the vine blew open for me.
Abiding in Jesus means trusting. Period.
As I learned last week, not trusting IS disobedience. The obedience God desires (the work of the Father John 6:29) is to trust the one He sent. Trusting in Jesus and our acceptability because of what HE has done is being connected to the vine.
Then we can grow in trust which is always being urged by NT writers (growing and being pruned for more growth). And as we grow in trust and in love for God and man we naturally bear more good fruit (good works).
How freeing! I'm just going to focus now on trusting Jesus in all things and spending time with him trusting him to lead me into greater fellowship and service should he deem me ready. Relationship comes first!
22 likes
@Smaxsun
I jus have to say this video changed my life. It explains exactly what I thought of myself and even though I loved god I couldn’t accept him loving me. Thank you so much! Your ministry is so needed!
4 likes
@dooda63
Been going through this season of God chiseling away on me and I felt that I had to perform perfectly before I'd get a breakthrough. Why couldn't I figure out how to be content? Or satisfied? Happy? I kept failing and failing, and I'd focus on the fail. I'd make my failures bigger than His grace. This message is exactly what I needed to hear. Self loathing is not the truth. The truth is, He loves me - every little detail of who I am. Stunning! Thank you for sharing your story!
4 likes
@fireponyyy
God bless you Mark, I really needed to hear this. Thank you.
2 likes